but I keep slipping out
and falling back in
and the darkness
and the light
are like magic
in my life
making me feel
so vulnerable
and so invincible
at the same time
and I am full of gratitude
and despair
happiness and pain
though sometimes
I simply don’t know
what to do
I have absolutely
no clue
and I cry help help
I’m feeling so blue.
going all the way
up to the sky
and the silence
of the mountains
is beautiful
and people here
are fun
the children talking
as they play
and there is that calm
that makes me
drown in the greenery
and turn to air
and light
in this blue firmament
vast and also white.
and I start to float
and I rise higher
as I breathe
and I find
there is such quiet
I can hear the blue
of the sky
its silence so deep
I feel the universe
pass through me
and I come back
refreshed
to the world
and with love
in my heart
I greet
my neighbours.
and more people
will come
like waves
under the sun
and it will go on
and on for a long while
and the children
play football outside
like I did as a boy
and neighbour
talks to neighbour
and there is mirth
in the morning
and I breathe it
and the birds chirp
and the sky is so blue
it soaks me fully
and I am born anew.
is the silence
embracing you
the air kissing
your face
your body
your feet
feeling
the Earth’s joy
at having
you here
the sky smiling
its pure
white clouds
floating
in happiness
calming your
mind
and the birds
singing
we love you
we love you
O so much we do
you will never
be blue.
and looks like
a wave
that doesn’t move
I am caught
in this struggle
tearing my heart
apart
and then I am broken
like a toy
that some child
was playing with
and I feel so sad
I can’t be put together
again
I am shattered
and in pain
and scattered
in pieces
bleeding I lie
screaming till I die.
Dominic Alapat 