our feelings fill up the universe
and our thoughts tumble
all over the cosmos like babies
so we are the rain falling
from the sky
which are also children
floating like angels
and we are birds flying
we are the stars shining
the moon hiding from ourselves
we are so strange
we are animals running around
deranged
then soon we become flowers
and lovers in a park
and a kiss no one would miss.
and sometimes
I go looking for them
but can’t find them
and new thoughts
keep appearing
and vanishing
O why are we
made to run
after ourselves
like this
like a dog leading us
on a leash
our lives are
running ahead of us
and sometimes
it is so strenuous
breaking our bodies
and brains
and only when
we realise
that all this pain
is strength
and wisdom
that we gain
making us better
and better
then this lesson
we wish to
leave behind
for our children
our labour of love
and we pick
ourselves up
and run.
and all around
there is
so much madness
in people
like some kind
of fury
spewing fire
from the mouth
burning everything
in its way
and soon
the universe
is in flames
our bodies
and the cosmos
are charred
and disappear
into nothing.
we are thrown around
in the air and before
we know it
we are dead
and this planet
we called home
is finished after
these billions
of years
it is destroyed
and our bodies
and other remnants
are flung about
in the universe
and all the beauty
the tenderness
the love is gone
and it is so sad
that we are
nothing now
and there will be
no more children.
strewn about
piling up on and on
it was like that
when I was a boy
it is like that even now
but the birds chirp
they don’t understand
what’s happening
down here
and our bodies
deteriorate and die
then we are waste
to be disposed
all this is so much muck
and you look at it
and say yuck
life is bullshit
something that
simply doesn’t fit
and we spit at it
and find there’s
nowhere to sit
before we realise
that we ourselves are hit
and our flesh flung around
bit by bit
and with wild fires
blowing about
in flames we are lit.
in my mind
the Earth
our home explodes
a big ball of mud
breaking apart
and it is
the fire inside
you can see
leaping flames
in your eyes
and as this happens
your head bursts too
the world is too much
for itself or us to bear
this we learn
before our bodies
are shredded into pieces
and with
parts of the universe
flying who knows where.
I fall at great speed
my heart
in total confusion
shaking in my chest
and what is this
I ask the blackness
and there is no sound
and I am unbound
and madness is my brother
he has his hand on my shoulder
and I can hear my own voice
in my head troubling me
and I say enough
and suddenly there is the Earth
I am hurtling towards
and I see that it is burning
and there are bodies upon bodies
stacked all over
and my mind is now
reeling like crazy
like some movie playing
at a really unbelievable pace
and all sorts of things
I remember from my life
though now it is useless
as my flesh begins to sear in the fire
and I hit the ground with a thud
and that’s my end.
Dominic Alapat 